Best of the Worst: Luck of the Irish

March 17, 2010 | by Tia Ayers

Siobhan’s favorite holiday was St. Patrick’s Day. So her boyfriend Henry decided that he would make this St. Patrick’s Day memorable by popping the question. He just hoped the luck of the Irish was on his side.

The two joined their friends on a pub crawl on the afternoon of the holiday. Because of the festivities, everyone was drinking, but no one more than Henry who had the extra anxiety on his shoulders.

The friends arrived at the final bar, which was to be their stomping grounds for the rest of the day. Henry approached the DJ and told him his plans and asked if he could use the PA system to propose to Siobhan.

“Awesome!” The DJ exclaimed and agreed to help.

Day became night and the bar was getting more and more crowded with people in green shirts, hats, shamrock antennae and more. The DJ found Henry and told him that he wanted him to propose after the next song.

With the moment approaching, Henry rushed to the restroom to prepare.

In the bathroom, he washed his face and rehearsed in the mirror.

“Siobhan, I love you, man,” he slurred at his reflection. “Be my, uh… Be my…”

The door swung open and the DJ stuck his head in.

“You ready, Henry?” The DJ asked.

Henry hiccuped as he looked over at the DJ. He gave him a wobbly thumbs up.

“Ready, ready, ready,” Henry mumbled, following the DJ out to the bar.

“Okay, guys. Before I play the next song, we got a special message from Henry,” The DJ said into the microphone.

He handed Henry the microphone.

“Well, my friends. We’re all here and you’re here…. and that’s why we’re here,” Henry began.

The crowd exchanged uncomfortable murmurs.

Henry spotted Siobhan in her green shirt and derby hat and took her hand.

“I love you, Siobhan. I love you so much a lot. Will you be my… my, uh, wife-lady?”

He bobbled as he tried to get down on one knee.

“I’m not Siobhan. I don’t know who the hell you are, buddy,” The girl answered back.

Henry widened his eyes and realized that even though the girl had the same red hair,  the same hat and shirt as Siobhan, that she was right. This was not his Siobhan.

“Henry!” The real Siobhan yelled from the back of the room.

Henry looked up.

“Henry, what are you doing?!” Siobhan screamed as he approached him.

“I was ask-asking you to be my married.”

Siobhan looked at the beautiful, emerald-encrusted Claddagh ring that he held in his hand.

“Henry, you’re drunk.”

“That doesn’t change the ways I feels about you,” he slurred back at her. “I love you all the time, every day.”

Siobhan looked at her silly boyfriend and couldn’t help but smile.

“All right. All right, I’ll marry you, you idiot,” she said.

The drunken crowd burst into applause. Henry tried to put the ring on her finger but he was seeing double.

“I can do it,” Siobhan said.

“No, no, no. I got it,” he insisted.

Henry stood up to attempt to put the ring on once again, but all the alcohol was catching up to him quick. As soon as he was on his feet, he stumbled back to the ground, passing out.

Should Siobhan reconsider her answer? Let us know what you think!